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Satan’s Beatitudes


Blessed are those who are too tired and busy to worship God, for they are praising my name.


Blessed are those who gossip liberally,  for they can divide the greatest kingdoms. Blessed are those critical of church leadership, for they are destroyers of confidence and creators of doubt. Blessed are those who work tirelessly for schools and clubs and themselves, but never for the church, for their loyalties are clear. Blessed are those Christians who speak ill of the church and disrespect it loudly to their children, for their offspring shall be mine! Blessed are those Christians who must be begged to assist and expect to be publicly praised for their efforts, for I can use them. Blessed are those who have no time to pray to God, for they then become easy prey for me. Blessed are those who hold onto grudges and never forgive, for they will never be forgiven and are truly my children. Blessed are those Christians who hold great hate for their brethren, for in so doing they must first also hate God. Blessed are the complainers, for they do powerfully execute my will. Blessed are the arrogant who are certain these traits are only in others, for they do surely walk upon my path.


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